+1+
I floored the gas, Penelope’s words ringing my ears. Outside the window Cascade Falls seem to move by at an impossible speed.
Evil Queen
No, that didn’t fit April. It just. . .didn't.
I mean yes she lied to me the night I met up with her at Ty’s. Maybe she had cheated to win the money in Reno. . . and Logan’s Party.
Shit
What she had done at Logan’s party. That had been-
No
I shook my head and turned sharply almost missing the turn for Ty’s. I pressed hard on the brake and the car jerked to a halt. Penelope jolted in her seat grabbing on to the dash.
She leapt gracefully out the car, her shaded eyes on the clouds. She walked over to my side of the car and leaned in through the window. I shuddered thinking about her strange eyes under her glasses.
“Come inside.” she says.
“No. . . This doesn’t involve me. I’m normal . . . I’m just…”
“Please.”
I realize she isn’t asking me and something about her tone scares me. I put the car in park and follow her into the restaurant. Ty and the girls are setting up for lunch. Ty stops mid chalk board writing when she sees us, she jumps around the bar and hurries over to Penelope.
“Penelope ? Is that you ? You made it. I didn’t think anyone would come. I sent so many letters and --”
Penelope instantly took Ty’s hand into hers and I wondered if they’d even met before.
“I saw your distress, Ty. I just hope there is time to stop this darkness; something bad is about to happen in this town.”
I listened surprised that Ty would tell April’s . . .er real family--- where she was. The family that had switched her out for a better and healthier model. Somewhere in the back of my head I thought about my mom, Dominick and the new baby.
Ty looked up at me and gave me a half smile. I couldn’t tell if she was still mad at me or not.
“No”, I said, “April’s not dark or whatever . . . she’s just. . .”
I stopped because I was saying this to the people who knew April much better than I probably ever would. I’d barley known her for half a summer.
“Does Thesia know ?” Ty asked, “Is she coming? Maybe she can stop April. If she can tell us her real name we can use it to control her—“
Penelope ‘s hand tightened.
“Thesia is dead. She died not long ago. . . her heart was weak, I think after she switched April and I. . . to be honest I think she felt so much regret over what she did.”
“That means-”, Ty started
“That I am Queen of the Unseelie Court, now” , Penelop finished, “ If my title and position is what April wants, then I suppose this will be a fight between my sister and I.”
I tried to make myself invisible, trying to figure out what kind of world they could come from where this tiny girl with frothy purple hair could be a Queen. She seemed so unremarkable.
“You can’t”, Ty warned, “Y-you’re human Penelope. April is much more powerful than you. It’s impossible not fall into her nightmares—“
“Unless you are Cillian”, Tirney says from behind me.
I shift uncomfortably realizing they had all turned to look at me.
“What?” I backed away.
Tirney continued not taking her eyes from me.
“At the welcome center, when Jerry walked in on us. April made everyone fell asleep except you. Even at Logan’s party . . . you can resist her. How do you do it?”
I shrugged my shoulders.
“I don’t know. It wasn’t always like that. I guess after I knew it wasn’t real . . . I just put up a mental block… like I do with my workouts to block out the pain.”
Ty smiled.
“I knew you’d be useful Cillian. Your resistance is an asset. Tell me. . .did you figure out April’s real name yet ?”
“…no, I just don’t think she is that dangerous. She’s not . . . evil.”
“No.”, agreed Ty. “Not evil . . .just different natured.”
I think I actually let out some snide noise. It was like when the counselors told us kids ended up in the system not because they were bad, but because they just needed to channel their energy.
“No.”, I said, “I’m not helping you do whatever it is you are planning. She hasn’t hurt anyone and for all you know she never will.”
“Like you?” said Tirney, “Like you never thought you would hurt anyone. . .until you did.”
“Tirney”, Thistle scolded. I’d forgotten she was in the room.
I stiffened and Tirney seemed way too pleased with herself.
“How do you know about—“
“People talk Cillian, it’s a small town. It’s no wonder you two get along so well. You’re both dangerous.”
I shake the keys in my hand. I didn’t have to take this. I didn’t want to get involved with any of this.
I turned to leave, Ty following close behind.
“Cillian, I’m sorry about Tirney, she’s a little outspoken. It’s just I’m worried about Penelope. Please don’t tell April about her. She might try something.”
“It’s none of my fucking business”, I say and get in the car.
I feel bad for cursing at Ty. Cursing at adults is what I usually did to get back at people who tried to discipline or counsel me. The thing was there as nothing wrong with me and there was nothing wrong with her.
We weren’t dangerous
We weren’t different natured
We were just us.
+++
I’d managed to successfully avoid Jerry at every turn, we hadn't spoken once since our fight. Tonight I’d taken to sneaking into the Welcome Center after hours to ‘borrow’ his keys. I tell myself it’s not stealing.
I had to see April but she wasn't making herself easy to find. The best I could figure is a girl had to work.
I find the keys on the hook and turn quietly out the center when Jerry comes out from the backroom.
“Going somewere ?”, he says.
“Yeah”, I stick to monosyllabic.
“Going to see that girl.”
“Cillian-“
“I’m 19, Jerry. You don’t need to parent me.”
“Well someone needed to—“
“My mom did the best she could . . . by herself.”
Jerry makes a asound of disproval and shuffles to the backroom
“Be back by midnight.”
I looked down at my phone, it was already 10 p.m
I walkd out not making any promises. I hadn’t seen April since Peneople’s appearance in town and I wondered if the two were related. April didn’t have a cellphone, so that was a dead end.
I knew she worked as a dancer and there was only onr place within 100 miles of Cascade Falls that had amateur night. I just needed a little back up.
Desert Nights! Was the only bright spot on Route 15 except for a gas station and an abandond souvenier store. Music pumped out the speakers and cars were croweded around the tinted windows.
I felt better about the plan when I see my back up is already there.
Logan’s red explorer is already in the parking lot, he had practically glowed when I invited him. And honestly I think he didn't care about the girls and just wanted to spend time with me.
“Dude.”, He said his frizzy blonde hair in a ponytail
“Hey”, I said. My universal greeting
I tried to act non-chalant, because the real reason I invited Logan was because the club was 21 and over and I needed him to charm the hell out of the bouncer to get me in.
“Didn’t think this was your speed”, He said.
“It’s not. I need to see April . .. she moonlights here."
He chuckled and slapped me on the back.
“You must really like this girl.”
“Something like that.”
+2+
I relax and follow Logan to the front door where we are patted down by a half-drunk guy. Just as I suspect in seconds Logan is fist bumping the bouncer. Apparently they were homeschooled together.
Logan makes some gesture shrugs his shoulder and then gestures me over, with a convincing smile on his face.
“Okay fine, just . . . no trouble”, The guy says eyeing the scars on my wrist.
I nod and follow logan in. At first Desert Nights! looks like a low end restaurant with bad lighting. The servers are wearing bikini tops but if sexy or hot was what they were going for, it was far from it. The men actually seemed more interested in the food.
A curly redhed around my Mom’s age invited us to choose any seat.
“Let’s go to the front”, I said noticing the stage.
“Dude ? Have you been here ? You do not want to be that clo—“
“I want her to know I’m here.”
Loga sighed an moved to the front. On stage a pair of blondes were tossing glitter and moving out of beat to the music.
“So. ..you’re dating a stripper. . .what’s that like ?”, he said a little envious and a little surprised.
“She’s a dancer.”
“And I’m natural blond.”
Logan ordered a chicken fried steak and I looked over the “entertainment” list for tonight.
“No way”, I said out loud.
There was no fucking way.
Her name. . . it was there. Her real name.
Did she seriously dance under her real name ? It had been here the whole time.
I waited patiently for Kennedy and Belle to finish their set, then sat up in my seat when the owner came to announce April's act.
“Gentlemen”, he breathed into the mike, “Let’s go to fairytale land with this local beauty, It might get a little crazy but let’s hear some noise for. . .”
The men cheered drowing out the sound of her stage name. Logan cocked his head forward
“What ?”, he mouthed, “What was it ? I didn't hear—“
The lights go out and single purple flood light focuses on the floor. She’s wearing a tight black dress that’s so tiny it leaves little to the imagination, except her back that is. She pushes herself up from her toes balancing on those black pointe shoes.
The lights come on and when she takes a casual walk around the pole, her eyes lock on to me. She looks worried for a second but relaxes again. I
“Is this okay.”, Logan asks, “Am I allowed to look. . . do you want me to look away, dude ?”
I hear Logan. . . I kind of hear him anyway because but all I can think about is her.
April's slow walk starts to pick up speed, she still has one hand on the pole, then suddenly she wraps her legs around spinning hard around the pole. She holds on with both hands and then arm over arm leg over leg she clmbs to the top of the pole.
Then it’s an elegant drop down into a smooth and painful looking split, she brings her knee together and moves to the end of the stage, pulling a sparkly scarf from her bra. She reachs out to loop it around my neck pulling me forward in my seat.
I vagule hear wooping in the background, when she kisses my nose.
“Are you afraid, Cillian ?”, she asks
"No. . . your name. You used your real name"
"Say it"
She places her heels on either side of my chair. . . because she is still putting on a show.
". . . Thumbalina"
She smiles at that.
“I'm yours”, she says
“What ?”
“You know the story . . .if you say a Fae’s true name out of true love you can make them do almost anything. I'm yours”
I took the challenge to heart, understanding why Ty wanted it so badly. She let go of the scarf and pushed herself back on to the stage.
She finished her set to a standing ovation. It didn’t quite seem fair, it was obvious Fae had some effect on men, but the thing was she was taleneted. She knew how to put on a good show.
“I hate you”, Logan said with a smile, “ I mean I was jealous before when Jerry was all like ‘I’m hiring my grandson, who is the son of my super-famous son. . . but now I like really really hate you… in a jealous sort of way.”
“If only you knew.”
It’s past midnight when Logan and I are waiting out back for the girls to leave. It seems a lot of the guys have that idea.
April burst through the back door with the the other girls following her. She has on a sweatshirt and those killer heels.
“Jerk”, she says about no one in particular and then tosses up a stack of one dollar bills, making I it rain. The other girls laugh and call her crazy, but they all go for the money.
“What are you doing ?”, I pull her aside, the other guys make thierw ay to their pick ups
“Making it rain”, she says tossing up the other stack and spinning around.
“Where did you get the money ?”
“Calm done with the knight in shining armour act, Cillian. The manager is a douche. He was cutting the girls and I short.”
“Where is he now ?”
“. . .in dreamald”, she whispers in my ear.
“Is that . . . is that how it works ?”
“What ?”
We walk over to Logan’s car, she leans back on the hood and I move to stand over her.
“People don’t do what you want and you what ? Give them nightmares. Is that your . . . plan ?”
“My plan for what ?”, her voice has an edge.
“For your witchy-goal or whatever it is that what you are planning to do to the other Dark Fae. Is that your plan for the end of the summer.”
“Why do you care ? You never want to talk about that side of me. Why are you bringing that up now ?”
She stands up and kicks off her shoes, holding them by the straps.
“I just . . .”
“Do you know something, Cillian ? “
The lights start to flicker on the sign out front, her eyes drop a few shades and I hear a faint buzzing in the air. The feeling is so strong. The feeling of fear and nightmares.
“Stop”, I say
“What do you know Cillian ?”
“Stop”, I say and then I just go for it, “Thumbalina. . . stop.”
Her eyes go back to normal and she holds her hands to her heart.
“Oh my goodness, how did you do that ?”
I smiled.
“It worked, I. . . I can control you. I can stop—“
“Oh”, she breaks into a grin, “That’s right”
She snaps her fingers and the entire place goes pitch black. The one neon light we are under flickers on and I turn to see Logan and a pile of strippers have fallen into a deep deep sleep.
“Do you think I’m stupid”, she edges in closer, “Do you think I’d put my real name out there for all the horney mountain men to see ? How stupid do you think I am ?”
I realize that April isn’t getting closer to me, she is hovering slowl, and at her full size it’s so fucking alamaring.
“Tell me what you know”, she demands and her voice has a deep edge to it.
“I. . . it’s Ty. She wants me to learn your real name. She wants to use it to . . .stop whatever it is you are planning.”
I told her the half truth. I still kept Penelope a secret.
I let out a breath when I hear here feet touch the ground.
“Cillian”, she say as the lights flicker back on, “I was meant for great things. I’m powerful and I have to show the Unseelie court that. I have to show them they made a mistake. I just want to be accepted.”
“I’d accept you.”
“I know”, she says, “ but you’re a human boy. . . a summer fling. You’ll be hundeds of miles away next month and let’s face it you have no reason to come back here. Me, the fae, Cascade Falls. .. we’ll just be a distant memory. Like a fairytale you made up.”
I shift as Logan and the girls wake up, they seem confused but shake it off with wayward looks.
“Right”, I go back to mono-syllabic.
Logan jogs over to the car and looks back and forth between us. He slides into the seat of his car sensing the tension.
“Can this wait, I want a ride back to town.” April asks.
She takes my hand and pulls me towards my car, pulling herself into the passenger seat I wave off Logan and then turn on the road . Without warning she rolls down all the windows and the sunroof.
After several moments of silence April unbuckles herseat belt and sits in my lap with her legs over the gear switch. She kisses me slowly, I keep one eye trained ahead.
The car swerves a bit but I keep steady with her weight in my lap.I drive slowly, one hand on the wheel. not taking my eyes from the road.
She rest her head against my shoulder, watching the dark empty road.
“It’s happening. . . isn’t it”, she says her eyes on the road, "The summer is ending. . . we're. . ."
“I think we can hold on a little longer.”
“ I don’t . . . think we can.”
“I don’t want you to turn out to be the bad guy, princess”
“It’s too late, Cillian. I can’t stop. . . not until they all understand. I’m going to make them notice me and they will accept me and take me as their queen or. …. .”
“Or else ?”
“. . .something, like that”
She closes her eyes, I feel her relax next to me. Before she goes to sleep she mumbles something.
“What “, I say
“That’s just how the story goes”
+3+
I”d watched a million fairytales with Anne Coleman. They weren’t all American, her dad bought back foreign ones with subtitles she couldn’t always read. Not that you really needed to understand the story to know how it ended.
Anne was watching Sleeping Beauty again, mouthing along to the words seconds before the characters could say them.
I tried not to think about April who insisted I drop her off in the middle of town last night. We had said a really short good-bye and made plans to have breakfast outside of McGill’s grocery.
She didn’t show, I had been running late (I literally ran there) but still I’d hoped one of us would make the effort.
“Hey”, I said checking my watch, “It’s getting late. Time for bed.”
She kept brushing the hair of her doll idgnoring me. I was used to Mark doing this because he was older and wanted to stay up late and hang with me. Someitmes we worked out together, the kid had a long way to go.
“Let’s go”, I said as if it wasn’t a big deal, turning off the TV.
She mumbled something in her high pitched voice and went upstairs. I clearnd up the living room, realzing this would be the last time I’d get to babysit the Coleman kids. They went home next week.
I kept having this fucked up thought that one day, years from now I’ll run into one of them and they’ll be like “you used to babysit me when I was a kid” I mean that shit should not happen to guys like me.
I fipped the tv back on and put in my headphones, to make it look like I was listening to music and not watching the ending of the film I’d seen a half dozen times.
“CILLIA—“
I heard Anne shriek my name then cut off. I felt something drop in my stomache and I bolted upstairs.
When I reached the upstairs landing I hearMark screaming my name too. I made a choice and ran to Anne’s room.
Her cheeks were red and wet with tears, she had twisted off the head of one of her stuffed animals and it looked like she having a tantrum
“Hey, hey hey”, I said, “It’s oka—“
She screamed again and I reached for the phone searching for her parent's number.
“Shhh”, I said gently shaking her, “It’s just a—“
fuck
I dropped my phone and ran to Mark’s room, a dark winged shadow stood over his bed. She bolted for the open window but I grabbed her arm tackling her to the floor.
“No no no”, April pulled away.
“What. . the . . .hell”, I managed I pulled her arms down and flipped on the light,
She turned away as if that would hide her identity.
“WAKE THEM UP “, I roared at her
“I. . I. .. you have to let me go.”
April stood up, her wings were uncurled and gently touched the trinkets around Mark’s room. The sudden stop in the screaming was definite.
“I’m sorry “, she said, “ I. . .”
I grabbed April’s arm and dragged her down the hal lto Anne’s room. Anne was sleeping silently now, the way a kid should.
“Look”
I pointed to the dresser where Anna had a collection of mason jars. One had a few catipllar slithering on leaves, the other the purple butterfly April had helped her capture.
“Those kids had fun with you April. Everytime I babysit they don’t stop talking about you and you do your . . . thing to them. “
“I’m sorry Cillian”, She picks up the jar with the butterly, “I’ve been caged in this being human lfarce for way to long. I can’t be put in a cage anymore.”
She looks at Anna and then unscrews the lid on the jar o letting the butter fly go free. She unwraps the sweatshirt from her waist and slips it over her shoulders, covering her wings.
+4+
I follow her as she hurries down the stairs, once we are outside I can see the butterfly still hovering by the light.
“What the hell was that ?”,
She brushes her hair back with her hands, pulling on the wavy strands.
“I had to do it.”, she finally says, “I’ve never. . tried it with children and I need”
“Why the hell would you even need to do that ?”
“They are fine. . .it’s not real. The nightmares aren’t real”
“The fear is.You know if you keep acting this way, people are going to think things about you. Bad things.I think something is happening with you April. . . something bad. You have to stop with the nightmares and thinking about the Unseelie, or whatever. Just be human.” I was practically begging her.
“Something bad ? No you’re confused. You’re all confused. It’s something great, I’m going to show them and they will all see the mistake they made when Thesia threw me away.”
“Listen to yourself, April. This is all so crazy. Can’t you just be. . . normal ?”
She opened her mouth and then closed it looking confused.
“No.”, she said indefinitely
“You’re making yourself crazy, hurting people. . . children all because your mother gave you away ? All this over someone who is dead”,
I said it I just let it slip. She did a double take.
“What ? Thesia is dead”
“. . . she’d dead. Your mom. She . . .”
“How do you know that”
I’m silent now because I have no idea what to say next.
“Cillian ?”, she says it like a question.
“Promise me April, promise me nothing is going to change. Just stop whatever it is you are doing.”
“You don’t understand. They just turned their backs on me. They knew what she did and no one came looking for me. They will pay.”
“If that”, I gestured to the house, “is what you have to do, then I don’t know if want to be with someone like that.”
“What exactly do you want from me ? Okay ? it’s time Cilliain It’s fucking time."
Her eyes were glossed over and as much as it stung, I realized now was probably my only chance.
“No.. . . tell me your real name. Tell me that and maybe we can make this work for a little longer.”
That was it, that was all I needed. Knowing her name would be a fail safe.
She shook her head, her lips sealed.
“No.”, she said, “I can’t trust you. I just. . .”
“ Then . . .I can’t trust you either. You just want to be exactly what everyone thinks you are.”
“What exactly do they think I am ?”
She steels her eyes and clinches her fist. The air around me gets tense and I can feel the anxiety of a nightmare surrounding me.
“What is it ?”, April’s voice is dark and heavy, “What does everyone think I am ?”
“Something”, I manage, “Something I don’t need in my life.”
“Fine.”, her voice is so low I can barley here it, “ I don’t need you either. You’re distracting me anyway.”
“You know you are the only reason I even stayed here. I quit. I’m quitting O’Conners tomorrow. I don’t need to be stuck in this fucking town where people judge me, where my grandfather has replaced me with Logan and a girl who just sees me as a summer fling“
“Whatever. . . I don’t. . . need you. Get the fuck away from me.”
"April--"
"Just go."
I’d been there, I knew what it was like to lose someone you thought finally understood you.
“You know. . . I really needed this summer to be okay. And you made it magical, amazing and fun . . .I'll remember that”
The skin around her eyes is running black from make up.
“April whatever you are planning you have to stop. It’s not too late to just let it go.”
She wipes away the rest of the dark streaks. Her expression is set. Just like that she’s over the tears. She’s over me.
The wind picks up and the dust and dirt swirl into my eyes. I know if I turn away for even a second she will dissapaear.
That was my last image of her-- Of the girl I knew as April Cotttingly.
Because the next day I learned what she truly was.
Evil
